Alright, so someone throws this idea at me the other day: “Hey, did you know that one good session in the steam room is pretty much like going for a decent run?” And you know me, I’ve heard a lot of things in my time, some true, some… well, let’s just say some are wishful thinking. But this one got me curious. Me, I like to get my hands dirty, figure things out for myself. Can’t just nod along, especially when it sounds a bit too easy, you know?

So, I decided to run my own little test. Nothing fancy, mind you. Just me, my old trusty fitness tracker – the one that’s seen better days but still tells me a thing or two – and a bit of time on my hands.

Here’s How I Went About It

First off, the steam room. I went down to the local gym, the one I’ve been going to off and on for years. Found a good, hot steam room. Strapped on my tracker, set it to ‘other workout’ because, let’s be honest, they don’t usually have a ‘sitting and sweating profusely’ mode.

• The Steaming Part: I did a solid 20 minutes. Felt the heat, definitely. Heart rate went up, no doubt. My tracker showed my pulse climbing, similar to a very, very light warm-up, I guess. Sweat? Oh yeah, buckets. The tracker even gave me some “calories burned” number, which, frankly, I always take with a grain of salt in these passive situations. I mean, you’re hot, your body’s working to cool down, but are you working working?
• How I Felt After Steaming: Pretty wiped, in a hot, slightly lightheaded kind of way. Relaxed, for sure. But not that energetic, “I conquered the world” feeling I get after a proper run. More like, “I need a nap and a gallon of water.”

Then, a day or two later, I did the comparison. The run.

• The Running Part: I decided to run for about the same amount of time it might take to feel similarly “exerted” by the steam, or at least what people think is similar exertion. I went for a 30-minute jog. Not a sprint, just a steady pace. My heart rate monitor, of course, showed a proper climb, sustained effort, the whole nine yards. Muscles working, lungs pumping.
• How I Felt After Running: Tired, yes, but a different kind of tired. That good ache in the legs. Energized, mentally clearer. And the calorie burn on the tracker? Significantly higher, and I actually believed that number a bit more because, well, I was actually moving my body.

So, I sat down and looked at my little “notes” and what the tracker told me. The heart rate during steaming? It got up there, sure, maybe like a brisk walk for a bit. But it wasn’t the sustained cardiovascular workout a run gives you. Your heart beats faster in the heat to pump blood to the skin to cool you down. It’s a stress response, not quite the same as stressing your muscles and lungs through movement.

My big takeaway? Nah, it’s not the same. Not even close, if you ask me. Sweating a lot doesn’t automatically equal a good workout in the way running is a workout. Steaming feels good, it’s relaxing, and maybe it has some minor benefits for circulation or whatever. But to say it’s like running? That’s a stretch. It’s like comparing apples and… well, very sweaty oranges.

I remember back when those vibrating belt machines were all the rage. People thought they could just stand there and jiggle their way to a six-pack. We all know how that turned out. It’s tempting, isn’t it? The idea of getting fit without all the huffing and puffing. But most of the time, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. This whole steaming-equals-running thing felt a bit like that to me after I actually put it to the test.

So, yeah, I’ll still use the steam room. It’s nice after a real workout, or just to unwind. But as a replacement for lacing up my sneakers and hitting the pavement? Nope. No shortcuts there, folks, at least not that I’ve found yet. And believe me, I’ve looked!